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The latest from the Coconut Telegraph
Floridians
and wannabees
| Search at TigerDirect.com: |
11/12/07 - No one has ever accused criminals of being extraordinarily
smart, but sometimes they do things that make you think they are vying
for the coveted Darwin award. In Miami-Dade county, a man was
sighted trying to break into cars in the parking lot of the Miccosukee
Indian Reservation. When police arrived, he fled, and ignoring signs
warning of the dangers of live alligators, he dove into a pond.
Yep, he was eaten. Divers later recovered his body, with several bite
marks on the head, fifty feet below the surface at the bottom of the lake.
The divers, incidentally, waited for the alligators in the pond to be
trapped and removed before they made their dive -- they are not in
competition for the award.
The candidate was identified by police as Justo Antonio Padron. He
has (had?) an extensive criminal record including possession of
cocaine and marijuana, grand theft, burglary and attempted robbery
with a deadly weapon.
Florida law requires that any alligator that kills a human must be
destroyed. The gator, who was well-known by employees of the
reservation and had been nicknamed Poncho, was being held for
inspection by the medical examiner before he meets his fate.
smart, but sometimes they do things that make you think they are vying
for the coveted Darwin award. In Miami-Dade county, a man was
sighted trying to break into cars in the parking lot of the Miccosukee
Indian Reservation. When police arrived, he fled, and ignoring signs
warning of the dangers of live alligators, he dove into a pond.
Yep, he was eaten. Divers later recovered his body, with several bite
marks on the head, fifty feet below the surface at the bottom of the lake.
The divers, incidentally, waited for the alligators in the pond to be
trapped and removed before they made their dive -- they are not in
competition for the award.
The candidate was identified by police as Justo Antonio Padron. He
has (had?) an extensive criminal record including possession of
cocaine and marijuana, grand theft, burglary and attempted robbery
with a deadly weapon.
Florida law requires that any alligator that kills a human must be
destroyed. The gator, who was well-known by employees of the
reservation and had been nicknamed Poncho, was being held for
inspection by the medical examiner before he meets his fate.
10/09/08 - Remember the 2000 Presidential election, when all eyes were on Palm
Beach County and the enigmatic butterfly ballot? And who could forget hanging
chads?
Well, folks, gird yourselves for a replay of that election fiasco. In this year's primary
elections, the winner of a local judicial race changed after a recount. And again, after
a second recount. Thousands of ballots disappeared after the initial count and were
not included in the first recount. Then they were found for the second recount -- along
with other ballots that had never been counted.
The county, which switched to touch-screen electronic voting machines in 2002 to
prevent a repeat of the 2000 election meltdown, had recently switched again, this time
to optical scan machines after Florida outlawed those last year. Turned out that the
touch-screen machines left no paper trail for recounts. But during the recount, the
optical-scan machines seemed incapable of producing the same count twice, leading
officials to doubt their accuracy.
In a model of understatement, Pamela Smith, president of election-integrity group
Verified Voting, said "It doesn't get any more swing than that swing state, and that's a
major county. This is going to be a very high-turnout election. In any election you
should be able to have justifiable confidence in the outcome. If you're having different
results every time you count the ballots, that's not going to create confidence."
Beach County and the enigmatic butterfly ballot? And who could forget hanging
chads?
Well, folks, gird yourselves for a replay of that election fiasco. In this year's primary
elections, the winner of a local judicial race changed after a recount. And again, after
a second recount. Thousands of ballots disappeared after the initial count and were
not included in the first recount. Then they were found for the second recount -- along
with other ballots that had never been counted.
The county, which switched to touch-screen electronic voting machines in 2002 to
prevent a repeat of the 2000 election meltdown, had recently switched again, this time
to optical scan machines after Florida outlawed those last year. Turned out that the
touch-screen machines left no paper trail for recounts. But during the recount, the
optical-scan machines seemed incapable of producing the same count twice, leading
officials to doubt their accuracy.
In a model of understatement, Pamela Smith, president of election-integrity group
Verified Voting, said "It doesn't get any more swing than that swing state, and that's a
major county. This is going to be a very high-turnout election. In any election you
should be able to have justifiable confidence in the outcome. If you're having different
results every time you count the ballots, that's not going to create confidence."
